dafeng5821 2008-3-7 15:53
夫妻之间可以“很黄”，不可以“很暴力
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[font=宋体][size=12pt][b]在寡淡的日常形态里，适当的“黄”是改善夫妻生活质量的一个好途径，做爱做的事，没有什么不可以。当然，玩到“换妻”那份上，就要好好思想一下了，这种“黄”是个危险的游戏，像玩空中飞人，不一定人人可为，一不小心，问题就大了。
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[font=宋体][size=12pt][b]说到家庭暴力，那就是万万不能的。
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[font=宋体][size=12pt][b]至于夫妻间的“很黄”，没有具体调查的报告，而家庭暴力现象则始终居高不下，不论是农村还是城市，也不分高知识人群和低文化群体，老一辈子那样，年轻人也不落后。我看到过一个令人无限恐惧的数字——夫妻之间“偶尔”打架的占调查对象的90%，经常打架的占67%，如果这个比例适用于全国已婚人口，那么，每个夜晚来临，真个是举国狼烟了，哪还有多少人放下帷幔，调好灯光来一场“很黄”的夫妻游戏？
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[font=宋体][size=12pt][b]我只愿意相信这是个不负责任的蹩脚调查，但愿广大适龄青年不会受到这个数字的影响而停下奔赴婚姻殿堂的脚步。
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[font=宋体][size=12pt][b]不论是老公打老婆，还是妻子虐待丈夫，上升到动粗的地步，我认为这个婚姻实体的危险度已经接近底线了，浑身的“挨打记忆”是拼贴不出幸福的窗花的。有个生动的段子这样描述——下等男人打老婆，中等男人骂老婆，上等男人爱老婆。
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[font=宋体][size=12pt][b]口角、拌嘴，这是凡人难于避免的，往往吵架有引流疏导的功效，把窝在心里的积郁给吵出来了，利于解决夫妻间的诸多矛盾。当然，吵架也有分寸概念，无端的骂战其实也接近暴力，只能将问题劣化。动粗则是另外一个范畴的议题了，也即是说，当“罪恶的鞭子”打向无辜的对象时，事情的性质即产生了严重的变化——它不是解决问题，而是在实施对对方人格的侵害，同时也是对本身人格的自辱。从法律层面上讲，这种行为已经构成了犯罪。
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[font=宋体][size=12pt][b]西方国家可以使用足够的司法资源来惩戒这些家庭打手，当然，我们中国小的有妇联、居委会来管，大的有派出所出警处置，只要你愿意，法院也有可以受理。只是，不仅被打的打麻木了，这个社会也麻木掉了——两口子打架，不就那么子事嘛。当事人一边抹着嘴角的血，拢着扯乱的头发，一边对赶来救火的邻居说：你信不信，下回我收拾他！
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让我们同心协力帮助震灾受难者度过艰苦的岁月
如果上天有不公平 让我们以人间的爱来填平
作者：张一一 湖南新锐年轻作家
我生长在多地震的台湾，经历过许多惊心动魄的场面，2004年南亚海啸大地震时，我又正好在泰国曼谷，加上连续两次在日本旅游时遇到地震，我自己又住在台北的高楼上，所以对地震特别注意，常看这方面的书，并向专家请教。
知道四川大地震，我立刻上网查看最新的情况，出来的消息虽然不多，却看到一位学生在成都宿舍里以手机拍的片段，只见画面中的学生躲在桌子下，房子在摇，不断有东西掉落，拍摄者像是记者般报导。我一方面佩服这学生的胆识，为地震现场情况留下纪录，一方面觉得大陆可能有不少朋友不知如何面对地震，有些话我不能不说。
一、首先我要讲，那躲在桌子底下的同学，可能做得对，也可能很不对。如同「大乱下乡、小乱进城」，小地震时躲在桌子底下确实可以避免被上面掉下的东西砸到，但是碰上大地震，那些躲在桌下、床下和柜子里的人往往是最先被压到的。由台湾九二一大地震的经验可以知道，当车库中躲在车子里的人被压死时，同时躲在车与车之间的人可能没事；躲在桌子下面被压死，蹲在钢琴旁边的可能活命。因为碰上大地震，屋顶和梁垮下来的时候，屋里那些结实的东西可能撑住，留下下面一小块活命的空间。至于躲在桌下床下的，则可能被桌子和床架压到。
当然你可以说小地震就没问题，只是请问，你怎能事先知道那是大震还是小震？所以管他大小，最好挑上面没有大的危险物（譬如吊灯、会垮的书架、高处的电视），而且旁边有特别结实的东西的旁边。我甚至建议你平常就要心中有个谱：房间里什么东西最结实。
二、如果你住楼房，请别以为低楼层最安全，要知道常常大地震时整层不见的会是低楼层。由九二一大地震可以知道有时下面的人全死了，高楼层却没事。甚至整座高楼斜斜倒下去，像积木一样，只要里面的人抱紧柱子，别被摇飞到窗外，常常都能没事。
所以如果地震时你在高楼层，与其跑楼梯被摔死、撞伤，或乘电梯被困，不如留在原地找好躲避处。就算你在低楼层，除非能在第一时间跑到外面空旷的地方，千万别跑出来站在楼旁边，以免被上面落下的东西或玻璃伤到。你想想！地震时高楼的玻璃窗能不碎吗？那一片片落下来，像刀子，可不可怕？
所以如果能跑，要跑得远，而且跑到空地。我看到这次四川大地震网上的图片，一堆学生在四边大楼间的天井站着，请问，这样安全吗？
三、为了不害人也不被害，如果你重新装修房子，有RC（钢筋水泥）墙，千万别乱拆，因为那墙可能在建筑时计算好，是承力的。而且当一大栋楼，有些RC墙拆了，有些没拆，地震摇动时，造成力的不均，特别危险。甚至买房子都要注意，是不是某一方向的墙比另一方向多得多。举例来说，东西走向的墙特多、南北走向特少的房子，地震时朝东西方向摇，很结实，是走运。但是换作南北方向摇，一堵堵墙，像「骨牌」，特别容易垮。这也是学校教室因为往往固定两面开窗，另两面是隔墙。地震时容易倒的原因之一。
四、如果你不得不拆RC墙，千万别用锤子硬砸的方法，最好用特殊的电锯。因为硬砸的过程中固然拆的是墙，却极可能伤到梁柱，何况墙上的钢筋与柱是连接的，别以为梁伤了一点没大关系。你试试：一支好好的铅笔，你折弯它，能弯几度？但是当你在上面用小刀，先切个小口，是不是没弯几度，就由小口的地方断裂？知道这一点，以后有人重新装修，你最好了解一下。这有关你的身家性命，不能不注意，而且小区应有管理委员会，由管委会出面关心。既要有住户规则，也要有执法效率。
五、当你买山坡上的房子，千万注意是「顺向坡」还是「逆向坡」。非但要选「逆向坡」，而且得注意建商的用词。他们可能会夸夸而言，甚至主动抬出专家教授，说「不能在正顺向坡建房子，因为容易滑坡坍坊」，接着讲「据这些专家深入调查，此屋建地不在正顺向坡上。」专家说的没错啊！如同有人说：「我没把他杀死（只是把他杀伤）」。「我没把他扔河里（只是把他扔在山沟中）」。当他说不在「正顺向坡」，就表示在「正逆向坡」吗？抑或只是偏离正顺向坡一点点？
六、了解地震的摇动与甩动力
地震的力量很妙，我曾听大地震时在高楼的朋友说，他看对面的大楼，一下子看见，一下子不见了。这是因为对面大楼可能正摇向左，他自己的大楼摇向右。
你也千万别以为地震时的建筑，好像你拿个大盒子在桌面摇。地震时不但左右摇，还会上下摇，前一波与后一波又会造成扭动。你可以试试，手上拿个软的长尺，尺的一端指向天，前后摇，那尺是不是不但前后动，而且扭，扭成S形？甚至发出嗡嗡的声音？那波与波的碰撞还可能造成某一楼层扭力特别大（所以也不一定高楼层就绝对安全）。我相信，如果用高速度摄影机拍摄大地震时高楼的瞬间画面，那楼不会是直的，而是呈「S」形弯曲的，你也由此可知，大楼的建材平常看来很硬，其实还有一定的韧度，正因此，才能经得起地震。只是如果建筑时，钢筋太细太疏，一圈一圈的「箍筋」又距离远，或没「勾好绑牢」的时候，就危险了。举个简单的例子，你将一把筷子用绳子每隔一公分绑一圈，跟每隔五公分绑一圈，以及绑紧绑松之间，在折的时候，会有什么不同？知道了这一点，小心建筑工人！他们可以不减料，却偷了工，你自己有一天监工、作工，也要凭良心，绑好了、勾紧了，别害死人。
七、如果你要在楼顶加建，就算当地的建筑法规允许，住户也同意，你还是得请专家评估大楼的结构与当初的设计。我知道台北有个小区中许多一样的大楼，经过九二一大地震，其中一栋裂得最严重，那栋楼最大的不同是楼顶人家加建了两层。想想，如果地震再大些，那栋楼垮了，压死许多人，是谁的错？这事我过去在作品中曾经再三提到，只是读者不一定注意。我现在要再说一次说：事关一整栋大楼住户身家性命，不能不小心。
以上只是把一时想到的列出来，我毕竟不是专家，只能凭我的认知提供参考，不能负责，大家还是得听专家的指导，也盼望「方家」上来指正。
还有，我在过去的书里也曾叮嘱大楼住户小心安全梯的门，一定要关。千万不可图方便、贪凉快而不关，造成失火时的烟囱效应，害死许多人。想想，你买钢筋水泥的建筑是为什么？你装安全门的目的是什么？可别让一颗老鼠屎坏了一锅粥！可别让死板不实用的教育，和自私自利、各扫门前雪的心态害了一群人、甚至害了整个国家。
对不起！我是这样的个性，如鲠在喉，不得不说这一堆……。
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According to Norwegian site [color=#007ca5]Nettavisen[/color] , Hans and his sister apparently enraged one of the local moose (mooses? meese?) during a walk in the forest near their home. After shouting at the gigantic creature to ward it away from his sister, Olsen dropped to the ground, and presumably his lifebar plummeted to zero.
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uhhh, no. the point is getting kids to know right from wrong. more to the point getting kids to IMITATE video games IN CONTEXT. in other words, if you ARE confronted by a group of rampaging orcs that are about to kill you, by all means, run away, fight them, or kill yourself to spare the experience of being molested by giant smelly inhuman things that want to eat your flesh. but in the case of racing games and games like "grand theft auto" just like the games profess, if you do these things in real life (just like in the game in the case of GTA) you will have consequences to deal with, and unlike grand theft auto, life has no god mode, and no extra lives, and you don't just "respawn" after the police take you down in a high speed car chase, and a 238mph crash does NOT result in your car blinking in and out of reality, and resetting itself to a neutral position in the middle of the road (nfs series)
people that buy the BS that video games are dangerous, ARE MORONS! parents that do not guide their children by rational thought, and don't teach their kids that "this is a video game, and real life is a lot different" and parents that don't play video games with their kids, to find out what kind of content they are exposing their children to, without ANY GUIDANCE as to what to think about the graphic violence, nudity, explosions, terroristic impulses, I mean seriously, I think it's about time you idiotic parents that think its all the video games' faults, and yet can't "control" your kids because they just subvert your will and find ways to play anyway, and because you take it away from them will only want to continue to do it into their adult lives all the more, which will cause them to get fired a lot when they start playing video games on the computers in their places of employment.
All parents that complain about the video games their kids play, need to start playing their kids games to see what they are up to, pose it as a friendly endeavor with your child, "can I play your game with you?" if they only have it on "their" computer and are playing the game, and if the game is single player, don't be upset if they say no, they no you are a "NOOB" and they will have to teach you everything about the game if you are confined to their room, instead ask if you can borrow his CDs keep "backup copies" of all of his game discs for him, and show him the value of that, I know I got pissed later in life when any of my CDs went missing or got scratched. several of my video games got destroyed by friends and friends' children. and parents spouse's or girlfriends' children. in fact I have none of the several thousand dollars I have spent in my lifetime nor any of the games left to show for it, aside from the games I currently play. which are mostly racing games, and an MMO but its not world of warcrap. Lord of the Rings online is my drug of choice, and I am kind of taking it slow, I have one level 49 that I've been teasing my guildies with, I've taken months, building him up, and he is now half way through level 49, and I go on raids, so I don't get too much experience, but a lot of loot. well not very much really but mostly epic loot. I also encourage my children to play video games occasionally, and to understand that they are playing a game. I mean saying that someone is going to run over a hooker because they saw it in a video game, is like saying that noone alive today has ever played Lemmings. and if you don't get that analogy, go play lemmings. if you are right though, I wouldn't play it, because you will eventually have to kill yourself, as a main theme of the game is suicide
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In [i]WoW[/i], "feign death" is a skill acquired by hunters at level 30 that allows them to take a page from the possum playbook, collapse to the ground, and convince their enemies -- who lose all ingrained animosity in the process -- that they've died.
According to Norwegian site [color=#007ca5]Nettavisen[/color] , Hans and his sister apparently enraged one of the local moose (mooses? meese?) during a walk in the forest near their home. After shouting at the gigantic creature to ward it away from his sister, Olsen dropped to the ground, and presumably his lifebar plummeted to zero.
Moose have never been known as the wisest creature in the forest, and the boy's show of necrosis seems to have worked, as both he and his sister survived intact.
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Someone who named himself after a very handy tool and a common weapon, sputtered: >Good for him and his sister, but isn't this exactly what we don't want gamers to do? You know, imitate things in real life just because they saw it on a videogame <
uhhh, no. the point is getting kids to know right from wrong. more to the point getting kids to IMITATE video games IN CONTEXT. in other words, if you ARE confronted by a group of rampaging orcs that are about to kill you, by all means, run away, fight them, or kill yourself to spare the experience of being molested by giant smelly inhuman things that want to eat your flesh. but in the case of racing games and games like "grand theft auto" just like the games profess, if you do these things in real life (just like in the game in the case of GTA) you will have consequences to deal with, and unlike grand theft auto, life has no god mode, and no extra lives, and you don't just "respawn" after the police take you down in a high speed car chase, and a 238mph crash does NOT result in your car blinking in and out of reality, and resetting itself to a neutral position in the middle of the road (nfs series)
people that buy the BS that video games are dangerous, ARE MORONS! parents that do not guide their children by rational thought, and don't teach their kids that "this is a video game, and real life is a lot different" and parents that don't play video games with their kids, to find out what kind of content they are exposing their children to, without ANY GUIDANCE as to what to think about the graphic violence, nudity, explosions, terroristic impulses, I mean seriously, I think it's about time you idiotic parents that think its all the video games' faults, and yet can't "control" your kids because they just subvert your will and find ways to play anyway, and because you take it away from them will only want to continue to do it into their adult lives all the more, which will cause them to get fired a lot when they start playing video games on the computers in their places of employment.
All parents that complain about the video games their kids play, need to start playing their kids games to see what they are up to, pose it as a friendly endeavor with your child, "can I play your game with you?" if they only have it on "their" computer and are playing the game, and if the game is single player, don't be upset if they say no, they no you are a "NOOB" and they will have to teach you everything about the game if you are confined to their room, instead ask if you can borrow his CDs keep "backup copies" of all of his game discs for him, and show him the value of that, I know I got pissed later in life when any of my CDs went missing or got scratched. several of my video games got destroyed by friends and friends' children. and parents spouse's or girlfriends' children. in fact I have none of the several thousand dollars I have spent in my lifetime nor any of the games left to show for it, aside from the games I currently play. which are mostly racing games, and an MMO but its not world of warcrap. Lord of the Rings online is my drug of choice, and I am kind of taking it slow, I have one level 49 that I've been teasing my guildies with, I've taken months, building him up, and he is now half way through level 49, and I go on raids, so I don't get too much experience, but a lot of loot. well not very much really but mostly epic loot. I also encourage my children to play video games occasionally, and to understand that they are playing a game. I mean saying that someone is going to run over a hooker because they saw it in a video game, is like saying that noone alive today has ever played Lemmings. and if you don't get that analogy, go play lemmings. if you are right though, I wouldn't play it, because you will eventually have to kill yourself, as a main theme of the game is suicide
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